And when I think back to all of those old stories around sisters and being seen by other women, I notice a pattern clear as day.
I was trying so hard to be liked.
I was a walking talking “I fear everyone hates me” magnet.
I was not my true authentic self because I was so fearful of being judged.
If I was going to become a woman who manifests thousands of clients, I needed to be someone who healed these old stories. Especially because Badass Business Babe is such a community-focused business.
What was that thing about synchronicity again? Oh. Thank you, Universe.
I was the vessel for what has become the foundation of our business. I struggled with the community growing so that I could make it my mission in life to create one.
Two years ago, I had my revelation around this. I knew that in order to make an impact in the world, I needed to choose a new level of consciousness that could attract the relationships I desired (and the money I craved.) If I was actually going to build a community and customer-based business in the online space, I was going to have to build a personal community of my own.
After all, how can you facilitate a connection in your business if you cannot facilitate it in your own personal life?
So I set an intention: I will receive high vibe friendships.
And I did.
If you’re reading this, there may be a part of you that wants soul sisters and may feel stuck in facilitating that process within your life.
So quickly, let me just share what I did to manifest my dream sisterhood.
First, in order to receive high vibe friendships, I needed to believe that something like that was actually possible. After all, if you set a goal and instantly feel that, “yeah right good luck with that,” sort of sarcasm energy, I could make a hefty bet that goal won’t manifest.
Find people who are doing what you want to do. We call these people Expanders. Before I manifest my friendships, I spent a great deal of time looking at other women who had what I desired. Stalking social media (in a healthy way) I saw that what I wanted was already all around me and easily attainable. I saw women who took girls trips to Mexico, communities of women on mastermind trips, I even saw zoom chat screenshots on Instastory that had me thinking, “Oh wow I can do this without even getting on a plane!”
Some of these women even openly talked about going through similar struggles when they were young (another expanding opportunity for me.)
Once my desire felt more attainable, I started to sink into the specifics. “I don’t just want any type of friend,” I thought to myself. “I want someone special.” I got out my notebook and wrote down the qualities I wanted my new best friends to manifest.
-Vulnerable, truthful and always honest
-Is dedicated to her own personal growth
-Has healthy happy relationships in her life
-Loves me for me.
I sat down, looked at my list, and then realized: In order for me to attract this, I must first BE this. This is an exercise I do often: especially in manifesting clients. I get really super clear about the qualities I want to attract in a client and then ask myself, “How can I more deeply sep into becoming an energetic match for this woman?”
Our relationships in life and in business are often a mirror for the things we need to work on within ourselves and for the people we desire to become.
Once I had my list, I held space to welcome her into my life. I started showing up to have deeper conversations with the women around me. When I saw someone I connected to, I attempted to develop a relationship with that person. Sure I got rejected from time to time and had to work through my old stories on a new level, but slowly over time, the Universe brought incredible women into my life. And last month, six of us got together in Austin for a week of spiritual healing and business masterminding.
It was magical.
That week, my life changed forever. I learned so many things about myself and feel like I have grown more in one week than I have grown in the entire year.
Why? Well because I decided I was going to. And I decided I was going to grow alongside other women who were growing too.
When sisters come together, you step into this magical vortex energy where everything just moves crazy fast. Especially when the women you share your circle with are women you aspire to be like.
In one way shape or form, all of my friends are my role models. They have relationships I admire, the creativity that inspires me, and are often living in abundance.
You become what you surround yourself with. Often the five people we spend the most time connecting to, are the people we become.
And if you are a woman dedicated to change, this is a very important concept to pay attention to. Community is such a powerful pillar of development. And when you have high vibe people around you, you cannot help but step into that exact same energy.
Community in Latin means, “shared by all with many.” So think for a moment and ask yourself; what energies of people around you are you sharing?
Community, when we are intentional about who we allow in, can a safe container for you to move through old stories, grow, and improve. And when we create a healthy community around us - one that supports our growth and evolution, we move faster towards our goals.
If we are fearful of people not loving us in our growth, or we feel like we don’t have people around us who “get where we are at,” it can feel harder to grow.
We simply repress our desires for more because we are fearful we will not be enough for the ones we love the most. Fear can stop us dead in our tracks but it doesn’t have to. With the right community, we can become better, not just for ourselves, but for the people we share our life with.
During our retreat to Austin, I cried so deeply for the old girl I used to be and the loneliness she felt. I sat among my sisters as I cried letting grief and sadness release from my body. After, a wave of immense gratitude ran through my soul. I have never felt so deeply grateful for the life I have now and the women I get to share that life with.
And I have all of this because two years ago I made a decision to break away from my old story of not being good enough and decided to embark on a path of finding love and support in other women.
And you can too. You just have to decide.
So to the girl who is lonely, the girl who feels like it is hard to find friends, the girl who is afraid of letting people in and is worried she won’t be enough for the relationships she desires or even the money she craves: You are WORTHY of it babe. Of all of it.
Know that the moment you release these old stories is the moment you’ll see an evolution in your business beyond anything you could ever have imagined. And remember, you’ve been given these obstacles as gifts so that you can better serve the world with your vulnerability.
So whatever you’ve been holding onto, consider this the divine sign from the universe to release it.
Let go of your old stories babe. It’s time.
Lauren Eliz Love
Start building your dream business ASAP.